Many men have entertained the fantasy of being with a Dominant woman.
Perhaps they are interested in the kink aspect of the relationship, the emotional aspect of the relationship, the pain and humiliation, or just the ability to worship a powerful woman in a more complete and absolute way than a traditional relationship allows.
But the fantasy of being a submissive husband and the reality of being a submissive husband are quite often two completely different things.
Itís not that the fantasy is bright and fluffy while the reality is all doom and gloom, but there are certain aspects to consider, certain things about the ways of life for a Dom and sub couple that may not always be visible through the veil of fantasy.
What really is the role of a submissive husband in a Female Led Marriage, not just the fantasy man that dreams of a Dom and sub relationship situation?
First of all, letís clarify that every Wife Led Marriage is completely different. At the start of a relationship of this type, the couple typically sits down together and draws up a contract that states the rules, terms, and roles of each participant in the relationship. It is often a binding contract that is hard to break, and the couple will spend their entire relationship abiding by these rules lest they both want to change them. Some couples will go for a casual Dom and sub arrangement while others will go for something more regimented and strict. Some couples simply want the female to be dominant during certain hours or in certain situations while other couples want complete and total authority to be give to the woman at all times. If youíre interested in a Wife Led Marriage, discuss these terms directly with your partner so that you can set appropriate bounds for your relationship, and know that the roles discussed here are just a general guideline based on a wide range of Dom and sub situations.
In general, the role of a submissive man in a Female Led Marriage is to obey his wife. Again, this can be at certain times or at all times, but he must always be willing to be there for her and to take care of her needs, whatever they are. This may mean that his role is to do all the chores in the house, to go to work to earn money for the couple to spend, or to do certain things for the woman that will please her such as take her shopping, buy her a nice gift, or please her in bed in a particular way. The role of the man is to always say yes to these requests and to make them happen.
In addition, he is expected to do these tasks not to his standards but to hers. If she feels that the job he has done is insufficient, she has the right to deliver punishment. It is the submissive manís role to accept corrective action and punishment should he not meet his wifeís high expectations. He should always seek to improve his service to her and to go above and beyond her expectations anytime he can. Most men will find much joy in this role as they feel honored and privileged to be able to serve such a powerful woman, and that happiness is a sign that this is the right place for the man to be.
Another role a submissive man must take on to complete and endure obedience training. This training is done not out of malice by the wife, but out of the desire to make her husband into a better servant. By completing these types of obedience trainings, he can start to re≠prioritize his own needs, allowing the needs of his wife to always take center stage. This not only makes him a better submissive man, it will earn him more praise and reward from his wife and more gratitude from her. And after all, most men desire Female Led relationships out of a deep seeded need to fully connect and fully satisfy the woman they are with. Obedience training and taking on the role of a perfectly trained, perfectly obedient husband allows him to better connect and better experience the relationship.
Finally, a submissive man in a Female Led Marriage must always take on the role of worshipper. He should, quite literally, worship every inch of his wifeís body, mind, and spirit, and he must always treat her as a goddess. Men that truly feel this way about the women they serve are much happier and much more satisfied than men in any other types of relationships, and it makes a solid, unbreakable bond of love and trust between the couple. This role is the most important as it truly is the foundation of the entire relationship. The man must devote his entire being to elevating the status of his wife and of treating her with reverence. It is taking on this role that solidifies his place in the relationship and allows him to experience true joy and satisfaction.
Female Led Marriages are wonderful relationships when done correctly. But make no mistake, they are not the fantasy play sessions one might see in BDSM movies or blogs or videos. Being a submissive man in a real life Female Led Marriage is a huge commitment, one that is not always full of fun and games. But it is full of love, trust, and deep satisfaction that allows both the man and the woman to relish in their chosen roles. And when done properly, with the male fully accepting his roles of submission and servitude, it is an arrangement that can last a lifetime.
Training Husband To Serve As A Slave
Making the decision to turn your vanilla marriage into a Female Led Relationship or a form of BDSM where the man becomes the slave to his wife is a very exciting one. It can fulfill deep seeded desires and wishes that are often ignored or suppressed. Moving to a Mistress/slave relationship can really allow both members of the couple to truly flourish and grow. But there are challenges. The man will have to be trained to serve as a slave, even if he is naturally submissive and willing to learn. Make sure that both you and your husband are fully prepared for the slave training, and are ready and willing to commit to this new lifestyle that can lead to pure bliss.
First things first, you have to be 100% sure that your husband is ready to fully commit as a slave. Get it in writing in a slave Contract. Discuss the terms of the training, the discipline used in the training, the limitations or boundaries in the new relationship that need to be met, and the details of what will be required of your husband day to day. This will ensure there are no surprises down the line, and it will give you a good idea of how fully willing to commit your husband is. If he wonít sign a slave contract or does so unwillingly, offering many caveats and loopholes to the document, you may want to reconsider.
Donít be afraid to ask for advice from fellow Dommes when training a new slave. Meet up with other Mistress/slave couples together, or separately with an experienced Dominatrix to discuss the best methods of training and what to expect from this lifestyle. You can get some great tips and advice on how to handle this new situation youíre about to embark upon. Even if youíve trained a slave before, it can be a different experience when itís your husband. The more information and perspective you can get from other BDSM couples in the same situation, the more quickly and easily your own relationship will flourish.
It is important to start a new slave relationship with your husband in a way that will create a lasting situation, especially if he is new to the BDSM community or is not naturally submissive. Start with simple obedience training that includes doing chores, following orders, and pleasing you and your needs. Make sure your husband receives many rewards for his good behavior to keep him interested and motivated. Then slowly you can add in corporeal punishment, verbal abuse, chastity training and any other BDSM activities you are both interested in trying. If you start with everything all at once, it can be overwhelming in a way that can create a negative response from your husband. Give him his training in small amounts until he acclimates. Then, once heís fully trained, you can do whatever you like!